A breakup is a serious, earth-shattering moment that in most cases leads to a long road of emotional recovery. So, why did Berger think it was even REMOTELY OK to break up with Carrie Bradshaw... on a Post-It? Guess what Berger - it wasn't. And it's still not.
Before we get to our Top 10, let’s acknowledge first that there are serious long-term marriages and relationships that end horribly, with lying, infidelity, abuse, and even breaking the law – and that those breaks are significantly more intense than what we’re talking about here. This list covers the ways to break up with someone that movies are made of, the ones that you can pass along to friends with the "can you believe!!!???" disclaimer, and the ones that hopefully, someday, you'll look back on and laugh about.
We asked our BounceBack members, who have been through some of the worst breakups and divorces we've ever seen, to tell us the worst ways they've been left to pick up the pieces and move on.
Some stories are hilarious, some crazy, some embarrassing, and some, truly unbelievable. We've forgone some of the specifics and categorized everything we heard into the 10 worst ways. From what was said to where it went down, this is probably only the tip of the iceberg - so let us know your worst breakup story!
The 10 Worst Ways to Break Up With Someone
10. ON VACATION: Who would you most likely want to be stuck on a deserted island with? Not someone who's just told you "it's not working out," we're quite sure. Not only have you now wasted your time and money, but you can’t leave the situation easily without added plane fares and stress. If this happens to you, break away and turn your trip into a rejuvenating self-improvement retreat... you'll need it.
9. IN A TEXT MESSAGE: Ah, the text. The modern-day version of the Post-It. Too wussy to do it in person? Text away, wuss.
8. ON FACEBOOK: Nothing like logging on to find your loved one tagged in a compromising photo with a complete stranger...to you, at least. Why this is called the "World Wide Web" and some people can't figure out how they got busted is beyond us. Besides, it's way too trendy these days - be original, people!
7. AROUND THE FAMILY: Don't make it a family affair - you'll seriously regret it. Whether at a sibling’s wedding (see #6), a family vacation (see #10), or meeting the family for the first time (really!?), this one is clearly ridden with minefields that will lead to nothing but trouble. If this happens to you, at least you've got your "people" nearby to protect you, support you, and promptly kick your brand-new-ex to the curb.
6. AT A WEDDING: The wedding. The defining moment for any couple. The pinnacle of celebrating relationships and love. The day they'll remember as the best day of their lives. Forever. Guess the pressure got to you, huh?
5. AT YOUR "SPECIAL PLACE": That restaurant where we had our first date...the bar where you told me you loved me...the bench in the park where we'd sit every Sunday... Why on earth would anyone think this is a good idea? Let the special place stay special. Just like there are other fish in the sea, there are other places in the whole world. If they can't find another place, you should definitely find another fish.
4. IN BED: Come again? Talk about ruining the mood. At least wait until you're clothed. This one is so embarrassing that we're having visions of the recurring dream where you're on stage in front of everyone you know in nothing but your underwear. Except you're not even wearing underwear.
3. ON VALENTINE'S DAY: There are 365 days in the year, and ONE dedicated to celebrating love. It's not like you can't claim you didn't "know" it was Valentine's Day - the stores, the ads, the cards have been in your face for weeks. Pick another day. It's that simple. Don't ruin this day forever for someone, unless you're really in need of some bad karma. (New Year's Eve and Birthdays received honorable mentions.)
2. BY DOING NOTHING: It was tough not giving this the Number 1 honor, and we're still not sure. Being forced to figure something out by yourself is sometimes the hardest and most humiliating thing of all. Coming home to find your love gone, with no note, no calls, no anything may just be the worst way to handle a breakup. It is definitely the WIMPIEST. Just remember that. You do this, you are weak.
1. BY CHEATING: Sadly, this is the most common response we received - and the stories ran the gamut, from the one-night-stand, to the ongoing affair, to the ongoing affair that you only found out about via "the new person," to the unspeakable announcement that your boyfriend or girlfriend is engaged to someone else (WHAT?!?). To these we simply say, come ON. Just break it off before you cheat. You won't hurt our feelings, we promise.
The bottom line to all of this? If this happened to you, we can 100% guarantee that you are better off without this person in your life. If THIS is the way they think is appropriate to end a relationship, imagine how they would handle life's other challenges. Not well, we're guessing. Time for you to bounce back and move forward to someone who deserves you and your love.
